We have all stood on the crossroads of forgiveness. Sometimes we forgive but do not forget and some times we avoid the topic completely. Is it even possible to forgive? Is it possible to move on without the peace of reconciliation?
Today is Shubquono. The beginning of the Great Lent. The Day of forgiveness in the Orthodox Church.
Today evening when we go to Church or attend the service online, we will see the priests and brethren make multiple prostrations, sing hymns on God’s abundant love and mercies, and persistently ask for forgiveness from God. It is the day when we are called to accept God’s love and forgive each other.
This day is special because we begin the Holy Lent with a clear heart- by unloading our sins in the presence of God and by practising forgiveness with those whom we have hurt and who have hurt us.
Is there someone in your life that you just cannot forgive? The things they did to you or said to you are too painful, too hurtful to forget?
In Matthew 18:21, 22, Jesus asked Peter to forgive his brother seventy times seven. In your context this may feel like impossible. You can’t let go because the pain that this person has caused, the circumstances it has put you through may be awful. By forgiving them you may feel like you are minimising the seriousness of their sin (however small or big it may be) and the negative impact it has made in your life.
But believe it or not your pain and you matter much more to God!! He sees you struggling and He knows you cannot go through these difficult emotions alone.
By practising forgiveness God doesn’t tell you to pretend like nothing happened or like there has been no hurt. Neither is forgiveness about going back to normal terms with the offender immediately after you forgive.
On the contrary God wishes that you face the experience upfront and take action, not with your strength alone but with the strength that comes from His unconditional love.
It is natural to feel resentment, anger and even pride from a hurt. That’s why God wants you to do the unnatural.
Instead of holding resentment and experiencing the pain in your heart repeatedly, He wants you to speak the truth, surrender your vulnerability to Him, give yourself the time to heal, remember the areas in your life where He has forgiven and loved you despite what you deserved and pray for those who have hurt you.
So is it really possible to forgive and forget?
In short yes.
How?
By surrendering our pain to God and allowing His grace –
- to work in our hearts (so we know we are loved by God despite whatever we may feel, say and do),
- to work in our minds (so we don’t dwell in the pain that comes with our suffering and in fact focus on the mercies God has continually showered in our lifetime )
- to work in our spirits (so we can be as loving and merciful to others as God is).
Because that is what forgiveness is – painful and difficult but also something that helps you find renewing love, joy and peace over the ever-growing bondage of pain.
Do you remember an instance from your life when someone forgave you even when you didn’t deserve it? Please scroll down to submit your comments.
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Hi! My name is Rubitah. I’m a Content Writer certified Life Coach, Counselor, Social Work professional and the Founder of Being Rubitah. Over the years through my professional and personal life, I have realized that prayers and love can do wonders to family life once you come to terms with yourself and surrender to God. Do you relate to me? Then you may like what I post here! Read more about me
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