We encounter situations that demand our patience, every single day. And even though we live in a world of instant gratification, there are a few ways we can develop more patience without losing our time or mind!
But first a story-
Once upon a time a King decided to appoint a personal assistant for managing his daily tasks. About 10 people were screened and selected for the final round which the King himself was going to conduct.
The King led these group of people to the palace pond. Each of them was given a big empty pot. The task was simple.
“Whoever is able to fill his empty pot with the pond’s water will be selected for the post. But remember, these pots have a hole.” the King announced.
Within a few minutes itself, about 4 of the candidates left, stating it to be an impossible task.
Another 5 left after giving it a few tries. “The King must have already chosen someone, that’s why he gave this task.” they said.
Only one man stayed, patiently trying to fill his pot with water for hours. He would bring the bucket of water to fill his pot and almost immediately the water would escape and seep into the ground.
He tried this over and over again but each and every time he failed.
Eventually the pond became empty. Suddenly he saw something sparkling in there.
It was a diamond! He brought it before the King and acknowledged his failure in the task.
” You haven’t failed” the King said.
“This diamond is a reward for your patience and hard work. And these are exactly the qualities that I’m looking for in my Personal Assistant. Congratulations!! You are selected!”
There was of course no end to the man’s joy! His patience paid off in the most remarkable manner.
Did I just test your patience with this story?
Well read on to understand what could be influencing your behaviour and steps you can take to develop more patience!
Photo by rawpixel on Unsplash
The dearth of patience
Fast forward to 2021 and imagine having to do a task like this for a job. You will say “Have you lost your mind Rubitah?”
Even if you had to, you will prefer using different gadgets and mobile apps to understand the trick behind the task first or giving up, you would have tried other twisted ways of getting through!
But if given an option,you will definitely say no for something that’s so time consuming, isn’t it?
Gone are the times, when you had to wait in long queues at the movie hall or the airport. Today there is bookmyshow and web check in to get you through with no delay.
Television viewing is also such a task today, that you pre record shows to be able to skip through the advertisements. In fact you would any day prefer watching ad-free programs on Hotstar or Netflix even if you have to pay a little premium.
Heck you don’t even take a second to switch a YouTube video if the content doesn’t give you what you want!
Similar is the scenario in relationships these days. We don’t have enough patience for our parents, spouse, children, colleagues, neighbours and so on so forth.
Where is the time and energy, right?
Yes times have changed. We have dodged patience and clicked on our Instant gratification mode- instant coffee, instant payments, instant bookings, instant love, instant break ups!
We always seem to be in a hurry!!
Of course technology is time saving and convenient but prolonged exposure, influences human behaviour in many ways. Read this study.
What happens when you lose patience
A lack of patience can make a person go through innumerable negative emotions. This results in stress that not just affects you but the people whom you’re interacting with as well.
- It makes you impulsive and you tend to make rash decisions.
- It may cost you money and sometimes relationships
- It makes you confused and you end up looking for better alternatives all the time
- It makes you unnecessarily emotional and sometimes fills you with rage
- It teaches you to give up or quit easily
How can you develop more patience
Slow down
Photo by Steven Erixon on Unsplash
When I visited Agra a few years back, I literally rushed my husband through all the tourist spots in the city.
I was trying to ensure we cover all the major attractions. But by the end of the whole trip, we both agreed we didn’t enjoy much and were rather tired in the process.
Perhaps slowing down was the key over there.
Manage expectations
Looking at scenarios that make you uncomfortable, with an open mind, is one way of developing patience.
A traffic block, a long queue at the metro station, an “I’m not interested to sleep right now” toddler, a long pending approval at work are situations you can expect beforehand. When you catch the triggers head on, you’re much more equipped to react with patience.
Take control
So many times you are pressurized by others to complete a task and you resort to impatiently finish it. Most of the times you are absolutely clueless as to how your work contributes to the larger purpose.
At work or in college you often end up making your boss’s/teacher’s priorities as your own. Take control of your role and understand what it means for you, and then direct your energies for the benefit of all.
Redefine the situation
It happened to me one time!
One Saturday, when I was standing in a long queue at the bank to get my currency notes changed (remember demonetization) I was getting impatient at how much time it was taking.
Furious at myself for leaving the cellphone back home, I was wondering what to do; when this lady before me started a conversation with me.
In the next half an hour, I not only found a friend in her but my waiting period helped me redefine my situation.
Practice quiet time
Who said that quiet time was only for kids?
Activities like reading, praying or meditating, gardening, art/craft, cooking from scratch, DIYs, playing a sport etc help develop good emotional health.
They reduce stress and anxiety and help you completely relax, slowly bringing about the virtue of patience.
Patience in 2021 may not get so paid off as in the story, but it definitely helps you build your character; making you a better human being.
Found this post useful? You might like reading these as well:
What does it mean to be independent?
Why knowing your true self today can help your marriage tomorrow
Are you trying too hard to fit into a group or community?
How to identify unhealthy anger
How to pursue a fulfilling life on a day-to-day basis
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Hi! My name is Rubitah. I’m a Content Writer certified Life Coach, Counselor, Social Work professional and the Founder of Being Rubitah. Over the years through my professional and personal life, I have realized that prayers and love can do wonders to family life once you come to terms with yourself and surrender to God. Do you relate to me? Then you may like what I post here! Read more about me
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Patience is such a virtue these days, and so needed!
Yes absolutely! 🙂
Patience pays dividends. Its always good to be with patience
Absolutely! 🙂