Have you ever wondered why the Orthodox Christian marriage is different from other Christian marriages? Read on to find out.
This blog post is only an attempt by me to understand the Christian marriage from the Orthodox point of view. Many young Orthodox Christians participate in the marriage ceremony without a clear idea about the significance and depth of each of the things done.
I too was quite ignorant when I went through my marriage rites. I am much more illuminated now and hope to illuminate others. All Christians believe that a happy marriage is impossible unless the grace of God is allowed to help.
The Orthodox Christian marriage is a sacrament
In the secular sense marriage is a legally or formally recognized union of two consenting people in a personal relationship. It is a social contract sealed through a civil ceremony. A contract is never expected to be life-long and unbroken.
According to the Orthodox Christian belief marriage is much more than a social, private or legal contract. It is a sacrament. It is seen as an entry into a new relationship with God, the church and each other. Each partner must covenant with God before they covenant with each other.
A whole series of sacred acts like prayers, hymns, scripture lessons, gestures and processions make up a sacrament. The sacraments are seen as special events and experiences. During the rituals of a sacrament, God reveals Himself to us and makes us more receptive to His grace.
A sacrament is commonly defined as an outward visible sign of an inward visible grace and ordained by Jesus Christ. All sacraments confer grace but only to those who receive them worthily. The Holy Spirit works in a mysterious way through the sacraments and we are graced and blessed. Therefore, sacraments are also called ’Mysteries’ by the Orthodox Church. God’s grace gives depth and meaning to marriage.
The Holy Bible records in Genesis 2:18 that God found that it wasn’t good for a man to be alone and so He said – “I will make him a helper as a partner.” Thus it is the Lord who instituted the concept of marriage and family into human life.
The Orthodox Christian marriage takes place in a church
The truly Orthodox believe that marriage must take place within a church because the church is their spiritual home. This unfortunately rules out beaches, resorts and other popular romantic sites. Besides, the powers of the Kingdom of God are experienced within a church.
Marriage as a sacrament must be conducted in a sacred place, in the center of our life as a community. Therefore it must take place before God and the whole believing community (the living as well as the departed) as witnesses.
The whole community gathers together and prays, blesses and intercedes for them as the sacrament is administered. God and the church community will help the couple to stay and grow together.
There are three people involved in a triangular relationship in a sacramental marriage – Christ, the man and the woman. Each of the two marriage partners are already joined in holy matrimony with Christ as He is the bridegroom of the church and each partner is a member of the church. So Christ Himself presides over the sacrament through the presence of the priest and the commitment of the bride and groom to each other, depends on their commitment to Christ. Only the priest and the bishop are allowed to administer sacraments.
The Sacrament of marriage
The Orthodox Christian marriage service or the Sacrament of Marriage is divided into two parts. The betrothal (Blessing of rings) and the ‘Blessing of crowns’. The celebrant blesses the rings in the name of the triune God and slips them on to the fingers of the bride and groom. The bride and groom do not exchange rings as in a western marriage. Neither do the bride and bridegroom exchange vows.
In the ‘Blessing of crowns’ the betrothed couple are initiated into family life and declared king and queen of the family. They are crowned with a chain with a cross. Crown is a symbol of victory and also suffering which they will face in unison. During the service they are also prayed over and blessed, confess faith and love of God and listen to God’s word. Everything is done in solemnity.
The ceremony of marriage in the church is attested in the words of Christ, “They are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together let no one separate.” (Matt:19:6)
The purpose of marriage from an Orthodox point of view
The purpose of the Orthodox Christian marriage is mutual help, guidance, spiritual fulfillment, companionship, procreation and prevention of immorality. According to Orthodox understanding the call to become one in Christ comes foremost. As such marriage becomes a partnership and a vocation in pursuit of God’s Kingdom, a journey together towards salvation.
In the process there are opportunities to reflect Him – as a good husband and a good wife. The relationship between the spouses should also reflect the relationship between Christ and the church. Just as the church is subject to Christ, wives should be subject to husbands in everything. Similarly the husband should love his wife as Christ loves the church.
As the spiritual love of God (agape) is poured into the relationship the couple should exemplify and reflect that love. As each partner grows in grace and love of Jesus, this love in them grows and binds them with the partner, with cords that cannot be broken.
In today’s culture divorce and living together have become fashionable making marriage seem outdated. They forget that marriage contributes to building a society because it models the way men can cooperate with God in procreation and living interdependently.
Marriage is a special gift from God, ordained and designed by Him. An institution that brings glory to Him. We have to believe in this institution if we want stable and sound societies. The spiritual component of marriages is vital to the survival of societies. Sexual liaisons and short term relationships result in broken homes, emotionally unstable children, among other things. A society that does not honour and protect marriage, undermines itself. Marriage as a sacrament offers permanency, exclusiveness, commitment, faithfulness by the grace of God.
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Hi! My name is Rubitah. I’m a Content Writer certified Life Coach, Counselor, Social Work professional and the Founder of Being Rubitah. Over the years through my professional and personal life, I have realized that prayers and love can do wonders to family life once you come to terms with yourself and surrender to God. Do you relate to me? Then you may like what I post here! Read more about me
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